Someone You should Know - Dr. David Stevens

Someone you should know: Dr. David Stevens

I am always excited about meeting new people.  I don't know how I was connected to pastor David Stevens on Facebook, but I'm glad I was.  I was invited into his FB group, second wind, second mile relationships, which is a lively time of conversations around marriage and relationships. After reading and following Dr. Stevens, I thought he would be someone you should know.  This interview was is Dr. Steven answering some questions that I posed to him.  However, after reading the responses I wanted you to have the opportunity to hear more and to have a chance to ask questions yourself. Therefore, I'm excited to say you will have the opportunity to learn more about Dr. Stevens when he is a guest on Dream Makers on August 16 (time to be announced). If you can't join us live, you can always go to Williams Innovative Network by following the link and listening to the podcast.  Now let's begin our interview with this introduction of Dr and Mrs. Stevens:

Dr. and Mrs. Stevens have the heart to help couples align their marriages with the Word of God, and they also have the credentials and the experience to do it. Their purpose is to help couples restore their marriages to God’s original design, and guide couples considering marriage through the maze of complicated and often conflicting choices. 

Their Ministry is firmly grounded in Scripture, emphasizing Genesis 2:24 as the foundation for a sound marriage. Their unique approach is to use the three parts of that Verse – leaving, cleaving, and the two becoming one – as a framework for helping couples align their marriages with God’s intention.

Blessed with a  marriage of  almost 50 years, being in Ministry for over 40 years, and having published 4 books on the subject, the Stevens’ have a wealth of experience and it’s their hearts’ desire to share it with you, whatever marital situation you may be in.” (Taken from their website, http://www.soundmarriages.com/)

Jewel: I gave my readers an introduction of your ministry from your website; however what additional information would you like to share with my readers?

Dr. Stevens: Your information is a good summary of what we do. From day one we have tried to put Bible wisdom into plain language. The theology of the principles are not that hard for people to understand if you take away some of the “churcheez” (That’s the language we sometimes use with each other, but is totally foreign to non-believers and new believers.) Our mantra has kind of become, “Principles work, follow principles”. So I work hard at trying to discover things that I can share that will help enhance the journey. You picked out in your introduction the Gen. 2:24 principle that we call the ‘Triangular plan’. In it you will find the whole structural basis for marriage. It specifies who, what, and when. This modern debate that we are presently having would disappear altogether if we took the time to understand and apply what is being said. Just about every marital argument or conflict grows out of not understanding or misapplying one or more of these three elements.

Jewel: Your website states you have helped many couples restore their marriages to what God intended, as well as give them the tools to keep their marriages sound and joyful.  When did you first have this passion for restoring and strengthening marriages and why?

Dr. Stevens: Way back in the sixties an older minister friend treated me to a weeklong conference for inner city pastors given by The Institute for Basic Youth Conflicts in Oak Brooke, IL. I had never in my life attended anything that intense. I learned more about the Bible and its’ practical principles than I did in half the years I spent in Christian college. They got you up at the crack of dawn and sent you to bed at 9 pm. Believe me they didn’t have to beg us (smile). The passion started there!

Jewel: Did you begin writing your books after getting involved in the helping of marriages or was this always a tool you desired to incorporate?  In other words, which came first your books or the helping of marriages?

Dr. Stevens: No, although I am a visual artist (majored in painting and sculpture) I wanted to be an author as well, but the books came along years later after I found I really had something to say, smile.

Jewel: Can you give me a brief description of value each of your books brings to your reader?

Dr. Stevens: Books: Marriage-The corridors, Castles and Conflict, (2^nd book) Marriage-Rules of the Game, Marriage, Catching a Second Wind, and Love Marriage, and the Baby Carriage.

The first book, Marriage-The corridors, Castles and Conflicts, is much about the basics from dating to marriage. I spent a lot of time giving the whys and wherefores of following the great wisdom of principles. This book was written with both singles and married people alike.

Marriage: The Rules of The Game, pulls no punches as we try to share the wisdom that will make marriages great. (Again we invite singles to tune in so that they are pre-prepared to understand the complexities of marriage if they are aiming to join the ranks.)

Marriage: Catching A Second Wind is geared towards couples who have been together for awhile, and helpful to those who are planning to get there as well.

I suppose the crown jewel is the current book, Love, Marriage, and The Baby Carriage.  In it I return and enhance many of the principles I introduced in book one. I begin with dating and go all the way through to marriage and parenting.

Jewel: While your books are geared toward married people, how can the single person benefit from your wisdom?

Dr. Stevens: Actually, all of the books target both single and married folks. The subject is marriage, but the emphasis is on teaching everyone how to be happily married and the things that affect that goal. You don’t wait, or should not wait, until a couple gets married to begin teaching them how to be married. Hopefully it is a lifelong growth pattern.

Jewel: I belong to one of your FB pages, Second Wind Second Mile Relationships and I find the conversations and questions interesting.  What was your goal for this page as well as your other FB page, Sound Marriages?

Dr. Stevens: Well, both pages are informative and often a lot of fun. We get serious or silly based on the direction of the questions and answers.  We have some outstanding regular characters that show up and keep things going. Laquanta has turned out to be our resident comic, Phil, our statistic guru, Theresa Iron-girl, our wise lady anchor, and RoRo who has become my protégé (she has read all of my books). Actually, we had 2 FaceBook sites and tried to collapse the Second Wind Second Mile Relationship site to combine it with Sound Marriages. The group refused to move and it turned out to be the larger more active site. It is the place where questions and answers really pour out. I’m glad that the members rebelled against our plan. The makeup of Sound Marriages is so different. It is more the drive by, with interesting statements and pictures and quotes from my books. So yeah they both have their purpose. To answer your question our goal was to get out there and serve the people. We can say of both, “And the people have spoken”!

Jewel: As a pastor you know the messages or lessons you present to others, God first uses them to teach you.  How have the messages you share with others benefit you in your personal life?

Dr. Stevens: I find that I must practice first what I preach! That’s the way it works. God has continued to bless us and our efforts. We are coming up in a few months on our big fiftieth anniversary. Isn’t God good?!!!

Jewel: Having published a few books myself and started a ministry, Williams Innovative Network (W.I.N.), I know it can be difficult to see past those early beginnings. How would you encourage someone starting out on their mission?

Dr. Stevens: If God gives you a personal mission, He will supply a mission field. Go for it with everything you have in you. My first book when finished I knew was good; God gave it to me to write. I could not find a publisher, so I found that I could self publish. It just meant that the money had to come out of my own pockets; ouch! I think I grumbled a bit, but I had truth that had to be shared. Afterwards a publisher showed great interest, even personal edited it and sent a contract to sign. But I had hundreds of books that would have to be taken off the market because there would have been a conflict of interest. In our house we don’t believe in wasting money, so the contract had to go south.  I never returned to traditional publishing. It works for many, but not for me then. Never say never; perhaps one day in the future!

Jewel: What final thoughts would you like to share?

Dr. Stevens: You know Jewel, my wife and I have done many seminars and workshops all over the country. We worked many years for the NIYC, an annual convention catering to the family, teaching on the subject of marriage. I still love doing seminars, but it requires a lot of work before you get there and during. I would like to now, get on some speaker circuits and share in a wider capacity. The work is different in some respects, and the audiences much larger. We will still do workshops but I want the chance to expand with the truth that God has invested in us.

Jewel: Thank you so much for giving me this opportunity to share with you and your audience. It has been my pleasure. May God continue to bless you and your husband in the great work that you do for the kingdom.

Final thoughts: If you interested in Dr. Steven's work, you can go to his website, http://www.soundmarriages.com/.  He also host two FB pages, Sound Marriages and Second Wind, Second Mile Relationships.  If interested in any of Dr. Steven's information you can contact him via his website.